SCARY AWESOME: Creepy Literary Evangelism Ends in Restraining Order

Lee Sharks

Shared privately  -  Feb 28, 2015

 

I think those might be some of the weirdest videos I've ever seen.

And I have a very high weirdness threshold.

A new lease on life, is what it's meant for me, to realize that there's weirdness that's weirder than what my weirdness threshold can absorb without blinking.

So. Thanks for that.

Do you have anything more recent, or has it been focused more on the blog?

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Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

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+sally sandalsocks​ oh and I read a couple of the posts there -- "Thank You, Satan" was especially funny -- that's the first thing I stumbled across, reshared on someone's G+ page.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

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it's been a while since i've done any videos. i was doing arts and crafts. but, i have an idea for a little song i haven't been working on. it's not so weird. thanks for watching/reading, most people don't, so that's kind of weird. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks I thought of this one:https://plus.google.com/112629856046124297336/posts/H8hexhE25nd

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks the only problem is, it's not that good.

If you look at that one, for resonance in mode, balance it out with this one, for sucking less:

https://plus.google.com/112629856046124297336/posts/4Cqqr3BGvXL


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sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

i found the first one more informative. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks poptarts

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

cool beans.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks "extinction event"

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"poptarts"

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks "more informative beans"

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

cool.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks​ when you realize you experience social anxiety even while using dummy profiles on social media, there's really nowhere left to go, in the realm of the human: it's time to become an inanimate object, like a rock; or maybe a velociraptor, or something without speech

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks that could be fun, for awhile

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

good luck. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks "space cadet tucks memento into helmet, forgets to breathe, learns typing by practicing "strong work ethic" and "impeccable personal hygiene""

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

silently farts

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"cool farts"

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

poop tarts.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"astronaut ice cream"

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

moon juice.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"deranged velociraptor decides to give up astronaut ice cream for Lent, describes symptoms as, "general restlessness, motion sickness, tart poops," medical experts "completely out of answers""

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

an actual moon you can chew

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

the cheese stands alone. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

DysenteryLand

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Though it stands alone, it is hardly alone, because of the power of friendship.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

brown town.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

#sanitationisawayoflife

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

#soisdysentery

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

lots of good stuff.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

So. This has been just about the sum of what I've accomplished, tonight.

Also, refreshing things. Lots of refreshing.

I was able to maintain several websites at a consistent level of freshness, and remain fully up-to-date on the most incremental accruals of meaningless data.

"Observe and report," is what that's called.

Also, "Refresh and wait. And then refresh."

How about you?

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sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

yep. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I refreshed the kcuf outta those websites, though

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

There was really no delay

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

cha-ching!

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Instantaneously, is when I received the updates

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Most of the time, I was so up-to-date, I had to make more updates, because I was two or three minutes out ahead of the other updates

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

It was almost like I was just sitting around, WAITING for the updates to catch up. Or just waiting for them.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

yeah, yeah,.. go on, go on..

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Or just waiting.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Or just.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Or.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

or??..

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

It was sort of almost as if I was sending my updates out into the internet, because I was so far ahead of the internet, that it had fallen behind

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

And it was trailing further and further behind

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

And if I hadn't sent my updates out to encourage and exhort the internet, to tell it, "Hurry the hell up, why don't you," it might have shrunk so far into the distance that it disappeared completely.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

And all the people who used to ignore the internet--now that it was gone--would realize how much they missed and needed the internet.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

But I didn't let that happen -- not tonight. The internet needed me, and when a friend is in need, you show up.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

With a flashlight, sometimes, or a snack, if she becomes hypoglycemic. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

But how could the internet become hypoglycemic? I hope you're not a complete idiot, to think the internet could become hypoglycemic.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Point is: you're welcome, internet.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Just doing my job.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Just being a friend.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Because that's what friends are for, is saving the internet.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Also, rides, if you don't have a car.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

it's been a big day. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

We should probably let the internet get some rest

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

poor little fella. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

But thank goodness someone, mostly me, was there, to pick him/her/it up 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Because of kindness

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

That's always been my tragic flaw, is kindness

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Also, humility

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Bigness of vision

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Teamwork

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

don't be so hard on yourself. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Ambidexterity

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Sharp night vision

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

sounds awful.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Strong teeth

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Complexity of conscience

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Negative capability

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I would like to not be so hard on myself, but holding myself to a very high personal standard is also one of my tragic flaws

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Also: 1st place in 6th grade school-wide spelling bee

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Caring for others

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

let it all out..

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Plausibility.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Just, generally, that my life is plausible, rather than implausible. It's always been very likely that I do, in fact, exist

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Good taste in music

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Precociousness

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

woah.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Often wins first place in lazer tag

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Self-effacing

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Generous

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Loyal

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

there you go, buddy!

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Forceful, when force is needed

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Without overpowering, when it calls for tact

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Innovative

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Tenacious

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

First among equals

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Enlightened

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Brave

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Unwavering

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Powerful

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Lofty

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Vociferous

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Angelic

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Proud, self-determined, resourceful

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

My own true mother and father

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

it bottles the mind. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

And so on

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"bottled mind reacts explosively with moon juice, medical experts "completely out of answers""

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

they sound smart. cool. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

It's mostly the white coats, that make them sound smart. They're idiots, really -- "hypoglycemic," please -- like a person dying of thirst who dips his head into the ocean and drinks, they're just sort of grabbing at whatever's at hand. Hypoglycemia does not, has never, caused tart poops. It's a completely different symptomatology. 

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Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

But they just hand out medical degrees to whomever.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I actually won a medical degree, because of first place in a school-wide lazer tag contest in 6th grade.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

$$$$ -- * Spent that right up *

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

*whoever

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Nope. It's the indirect object, there. "whomever"

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I better double check or then I will look like even more of a jackass

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Thats what google is for

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

But I'm pretty sure

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Yeah it's definitely whomever

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Did I mention gracious?

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I don't think I mentioned gracious.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Don't feel bad -- it's hard when you don't have 86 PhDs

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

=)

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I was trying to do a different kind of smiley face, like a smug sort of exaggerated, insincere -- but playful -- whole face grin, but then I realized I don't know how to do that. I just have the one expression.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

oh good, you were right. yum yum yum. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

=)

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

feel any better now? 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Maybe

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Probably not, we'll go with that

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

How about you?

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

this isn't about me. never was... or was it?? 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I mean you are still here, as part of this conversation, however nominally.

That should be troubling. 

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

don't worry about it.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I guess not. Maybe some other time.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

maybe.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Same with the internet.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

and space pants. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

This is really insufferable, though. The idea was, it would either morph, into a more substantive and mutually engaging conversation, or just drift off, and sort of hang over the cliff for a little while, and make no sound, and then go under. But this -- this is insufferable. A lagging but persistent trickle. Just like the internet.

You're going to get the last word, right?

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Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I mean I didn't want it anyways.

What good are space pants in space? 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

They're more for lounging around the house.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

you're idea was that i'd be more friendly than i am. i wasn't, so you thought i was a jerk, so you treated me like a jerk, so i went with the flow without bothering to compete with your quantity of matter of facts type stuff. easy peasy, i'm bored. you too. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Maybe. That might describe it. "Jerk" isn't the word I'd use. But that's probably a pretty accurate description, if I'm being honest about it.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

That's why I often lie, instead

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

But still -- granted

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

So instead let me say something like -- tx for chatting, & nice to meet you.

Until then.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

lying is bad for you. unless it's funny. but still. safety first.

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

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it was fun. we have fun.. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

That's how I feel about life, mostly: "bad for you unless it's funny" -- probably if you HAD engaged more, I would have become bored, and gone to bed sooner. So really, we could say, probably the internet is still alive at this very moment because of your heroic actions.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

I give you an "A" for that

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"Local woman rushes into burning building to save internet, city hall prepares award ceremony"

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

thanks, teach'.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

"Local woman rushes into burning building to save internet, but internet had already fallen asleep. Authorities question whereabouts of space pants"

sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

well done.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks what about this one:https://plus.google.com/112629856046124297336/posts/ddhL6D7aDLr

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

It's hard to impress the internet.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

All my life, I have been trying to impress the internet, but nothing I do will impress the internet. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

All day long I invent tiny brand new universes for the purpose of impressing the internet, but the internet has seen it all before. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Also, the internet is fickle. Sometimes I invent strange new universes containing fantastic creatures, elegant natural laws, complex sentient species flung out across the stars, quixotic philosophical concepts, punchy catchphrases, etc, which have not before been invented. The internet just shrugs. Other times, I am not even trying, just sort of begging the internet to express a high level of personal disinterest in the new universe I have created, which is mostly just a rock on a string, and the internet becomes extremely interested for a brief period of time: "There's something special about you," the internet says. And vice versa -- point is, there is seemingly no rational relationship between the qualitative awesomeness of the universes I create and the internet's relative impression of "spiritual uniqueness and strong personal worth."

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Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

What I'm really shooting for is a state of "mild to moderate indulgence towards persistent self-absorption," from the internet, which will I'm sure transform "persistent self-absorption" into something more admirable and potentially bestselling, such as "personal money" or "social license"

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Don't you think?

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Ok, serious question: what about this one:

https://plus.google.com/112629856046124297336/posts/WECY7WBtAeN

?

I was very excited about this project. Have about 100 pages written.

But then I became doubtful of the project, and felt that perhaps I should focus on social media comments, instead.

As an informed and trustworthy observer, with a studied stance of objective, disinvested regard, do you feel that this project has a high level of intrinsic merit, or that I should focus on other, more worthwhile projects, such as personal hygiene and social media comments?

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Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

Increasingly, I only undertake such writing projects as I can complete 100% from within the cosmos of my phone.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

This introduces obvious limitations, but also startles with unexpected possibilities. 

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

All of this conversation here? I wrote this all on my phone, using just my thoughts (and fingers).

Believe it.

Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

G+ is sort of a slum, if you hadn't noticed.

You get in there and you sort of realize that, but then you're stuck.

Or were born there.

Just like a slum.

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sally sandalsocks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

i'm sorry. you were nice to me , and i should've acted nicer in return, even if it was all an elaborate plan to read your poems.. which i did scan over, and found the first one to be more informative, because i could actually soak it in with a scan. the second one was long. inviting someone to read something that long as a way of introducing yourself was impractical on your part, but still, i could've used more sensitivity, or considered the option of offering to read it later.. i honestly didn't mean to hurt your feelings. by the time i realized how sincerely defensive you were, i'd already starting bullshitting.. but that was before i realized how scary you are. i'm honestly scared now, and i don't like it very much. i don't want anymore trouble. i plan to return to keeping to myself, and consider this a lesson learned. please accept my apology by leaving me alone now, please. 

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Lee Sharks

Feb 28, 2015

 

 

+sally sandalsocks​​ ??? Sure thing -- I thought we were bullshitting the whole time. I wasn't legitimately offended -- but yikes! Scary?

I will not pursue this, any further -- though I am a little confused about what wires crossed --

It's all an elaborate ruse.

Sorry to have worried you --

L

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Lee Sharks

Mar 1, 2015

 

 

"Scary awesome"

Lee Sharks

Mar 4, 2015

 

 

"Scary fun"

Lee Sharks

Mar 5, 2015

 

 

"Scary mash potatoes"

(c) 2015 lee sharks

(c) 2015 sally sandalsocks